Some days are hard to get by

Joined Alvin and Sam for church service at PLMC today. It's definitely a break from what I'm used to. No frills, no entertainment, just a simple message and time of worship that in its own way was powerful. I enjoyed it.

The message spoke to me, especially when the pastor said, is there someone in your life that you've been holding on to, that you know you have to let go of. That kinda shook me, I all but broke down. Started crying, couldn't stop. And I thought I had it all under control. These days church services tend to get me a bit weepy. Oh well. Time to start afresh.

Guess I'll try out the cell, see how it goes. Hope it's a better fit than the others I've tried. As it happens, one of the cell leaders is my ex-classmate from Crescent. That's a positive sign, right? At least I know people there. That helps some.

Another little thing that perked me up: I was leafing through The Peak Performance Woman the other day in the bathroom (uh kay, I need to read when I'm in there. So now you know. Too much info? Haha.) and I came across a couple of quotes I really liked. The first one goes: When God wants to send you a gift, He wraps it up in a problem. The bigger the problem, the bigger the gift. Nice. I guess my gift's gotta be pretty big then. Heh. Oh well at least I'm trying to think positive.

The second quote goes: You develop courage by acting courageously whenever you feel like acting otherwise. I like that. Courage.

Anyway, I got this book for my 22nd birthday. Thanks Pete! There are some really great quotes in there ;) Good little lessons to take to heart, really.

Listening to the Blank Walls CD now, the latest offering by The Observatory. All I can say is, Whoa. I love this album so much, it's way cooler than the first one. Already I'm hooked on Acid Pills. And Sea of Doubts is just beautiful, Leslie's voice is so smooth on that one. I'm just sad they didn't include the passing rain song, been waiting for it for so long. Still, downloads available on their new site. Check them out at http://theobservatory.com.sg/main.php?content=content/news.php&currid=0. They're awesome.

Their gig at the Esplanade recital studios on Friday night was just amazing. Despite the hiccups with the sound, they gave a fantastic show. I got the CD, poster and T-shirt, which has a gorgeous funky design. Love love love it. And the CD cover rocks! It looks like a blank black cover, but it's actually heat-sensitive. Under heat the same design that's on the shirt shows up, well a little more of it really. Should have gotten the poster autographed as well, it's up on my wall now. It would look so good with all their autographs on it. Well at least I got the CD cover autographed. Viv addressed it to Mel =P Evan drew a cat haha. Greg got his addressed to Crapshoot. I'm jealous.

And oh the drums! The guitars! The bass! Let's hope someday I play half as well as Victor... I'm totally in awe of him. Man. More guitar practice!!!!!

Which reminds me... Tuesday's a 'holiday' for me. Whee! Planning what to do with my free day now. Probably watch The Cave with Sam. Hope it's good. Maybe I'll watch March of the Penguins then too, if I don't get to watch it tomorrow. We'll see. Looking forward to the movies. I miss the cinema.

Time for bed. Been so tired this week. Trying to sleep earlier but it hasn't been easy. So little time, so much to do. Been trying to SPICE up my life lately (haha okay that's a personal joke, I don't expect anyone to get it). Happy to report that so far I've done (more or less) what I set out to do from last weekend on. Here's my list, or the top 6 anyway...
1. Go out with friends more often, at least once a fortnight
2. Try new churches and join a cell
3. Morning runs on Wed and Fri
4. New and funkier clothes
5. Learn to play guitar
6. More outdoor activities - trekking, diving, kayaking, etc

So far I've:
1. Met up with Sabrina, crashed the GEP party, had dinner with Greg and Alvin, gone bikini shopping with Greg (does he count as a friend? I guess) and I'm planning to meet up with Rey soon. There's also Penguins and The Cave this week. Friends definitely helping with the depression thingy.
2. Tried Sam's church and will try the cell this week
3. Gone for morning runs on Wed and Fri and loved them
4. Bought 1 new funky shirt (guess what colour?), 3 new pairs of undies, and 5 new bikinis. Now I've got something to wear for diving ;) It's nice to shop with an ex, I value his opinion 'cos he knows my body best, and I don't have to worry about awkwardness, 'cos there isn't any. The upside of breaking up. I guess.
5. Had 1 guitar lesson so far. Learned 9 chords and Kumbaya. Sort of.
6. Signed up for diving in a couple of weeks. Hence the bikinis. Whee!

So far, so good. Let's see if I can keep this up.

acid pills
twice a day
down to half a pack of smokes a day
have a drink or two
when i've quit a few
watch the habit catch up with you

give me hope
take me home
gently rub my back
i may breathe shallow
i never know these things
i'm afraid of things
yes i might have blown a fuse or two you know

maybe now
i may rest
turn the sound of hustle-bustle off
i've always made mistakes
it's just my mental state
watch the fear it keeps up with you

some days are hard to get by


Oh yeah anybody interested in the Nokia Starlight Cinema thingy? I wanna go on the 19th for Madagascar.